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Steve Martin

Atheists Don't Have No Songs (live)

Atheists Don't Have No Songs (AKA The Atheist Hymnal)
Christians have their hymns and pages,
Hava Nagila's for the Jews,
Baptists have the rock of ages,
Atheists just sing the blues.

Romantics play Claire de Lune,
Born agains sing 'He is risen,'
But no one ever wrote a tune,
For godless existentialism.

For Atheists there's no good news. They'll never sing a song of faith.
In their songs they have a rule: the 'he' is always lowercase.
The 'he' is always lowercase.

Some folks sing a Bach cantata,
Lutherans get Christmas trees,
Atheist songs add up to nada,
But they do have Sundays free.

Pentecostals sing to heaven,
Coptics have the books of scrolls,
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Numerologists can count to seven,
Atheists have rock and roll.

For Atheists there's no good news. They'll never sing a song of faith.
In their songs they have a rule: the 'he' is always lowercase.
The 'he' is always lowercase.

Atheists don't have no songs.
Christians have their hymns and pages,
Hava Nagila's for the Jews,
Baptists have the rock of ages,
Atheists just sing the blues.

Catholics dress up for Mass,
And listen to, Gregorian chants.
Atheists just take a pass, Watch football in their underpants.
Watch football in their underpants.

Atheists don't have no songs.