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Steady Hands
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Absent Without Leave
I'm sorry has never cut it since, since the day you chose to leave us
Because you couldn't handle this
I feel like leaving too, forgetting all of this
But the images burned in my head will haunt eternally
I have seen the dead
They walk the earth with smiles on their faces
Thinking nothing of the time that they have all been wasting
Then I remember you full of hope and hatred
Loving only yourself 'til you did yourself in
All the things I never said eat me alive because you never said goodbye
And all my mistakes, they keep me awake and wondering how I could have changed things
Sometimes I think back to that hopeless night and I am alone
Walk down that empty hallway to that cold apartment where your body lay
Lifeless and empty, as if some sort of thief
A body snatcher taking from me
I enter the room where you took your last breath, and I find the note folded on the bed
I know what's coming but still I have to read
The last will and testament of the willingly deceased
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“I took my life because I cared about you less
Than the pain inside my body, my soul my heart and head
And I'd ask for your forgiveness if I thought it could change my fate
But I'll burn in hell for my sins and I don't regret a thing”
And that was all you wrote
A short and painful note
I may remember different or embellish it too much
But time never heals a thing
The days all cloud my judgment
But the words scrawled on the paper
Could never say enough to fix what you did
You selfish low-life
No chariot
No saving grace
The seraphim have abandoned me
No chariot
No saving grace
No seraphim to come take me away
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