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Hoyt Axton
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Speed Trap (Out of State Cars)
I'm the cop in a little bitty town, and I don't get much pay.
But I've caught 17 out-of-state cars, and 4 of my friends today.
Well, I let the home-town boys go home, they paid $5.00 bail.
But all of them tourists in the out-of-state cars, had to go to jail.
Well, they hollered and they moaned — they cried and they groaned,
They all swore that they'd sue
But the judge was high, and so was I — and we needed the money too.
See, the judge and me got a deal you see — we split the money fair,
'Cept for 20% to the county seat — to keep the law out of our hair.
And old Charlie's workin' out real good, down at the corner store where the red light is;
He sees them out-of-state plates 2 blocks away.
And when they get right up on top of that green light,
Old Charlie pushes that secret button underneath the corner drug store counter.
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That yellow light only lasts for a tenth of a second.
See, the county pays me about forty a week — can't get the livin' in.
If it wasn't for the tourists and those out-of-state cars, I'd have no loot to spend.
But the way it stands this year so far, I've made a hundred thou,
For a high school drop-out I'm a doin' fine,
I make more than the president now — 'course he's honest!
So, if you're drivin' down the road, and flashin' lights you see,
If they're on top of a red Rolls Royce, you can bet your boots it's me.
'Cause I'm the cop in a little bitty town, and I'd sure like to see
All you drivers in them out-of-state cars try to get by me.
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