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Dana Lyons



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Dana Lyons

Ride the Lawn

My Grandpa was a cowboy and his pa before him
They rode the range, killed the buffalo and fought the Indian
But the great herds on the prairie and the wild frontier is gone
So to carry on my heritage, I go out and ride the lawn

Ride the lawn, ride the lawn
Here on my quarter acre lot I sing my freedom song
Ride the lawn, ride the lawn
We'll hunt the dandelion down and wack him till he's gone

My neighbor is a slacker and he rarely rides the lawn
He says that he likes wildflowers with dew on them at dawn
But the enemy travels quickly when the winds are strong
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Next week while he's on vacation, his dandies will be gone

The problem with suburbia is you cannot shoot your gun
So how does one kill herds of moles who eat grass just for fun
Well I've loaded up my arsenal with shells and amo cans
And under cover of the fireworks, July 4th I'll make my stand

My son came home from college and he criticized my lawn
He said fertilizers, pesticides, and herbicides are wrong!
Well I'll listen to your politics and your weirdo leftist songs
But when you're under my roof, don't you dare speak ill of lawns