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Tripod

Theme from MASH Guy

Ah, that song that we just did, Lingering Dad, it's got the theme from M*A*S*H in it, quite obviously. Um, it's on our new DVD, and we had to a lot of trouble to get it on there for, you know, copyright reasons. Um, it cost like two and a half grand, I think. Was that right?
Yeah
And then, ah, the final sort of hoop we had to jump through was send it to the actual guy who wrote it to get his, you know, final permission.
So we wrote this next song about him.

I am the Theme from M*A*S*H Guy,
My kids are the theme from M*A*S*H Guy's kids,
My sister is the sister of the guy who wrote
The theme from M*A*S*H

It's all I ever did
It might be all I ever do
I sit in a room in a house
Built from the proceeds of the theme from M*A*S*H

It's my legacy
I will always be
To everybody and to me
The guy who wrote the theme
From M*A*S*H! (They end the note in a big scream)

Whenever anybody does a version
Of the theme from M*A*S*H
They are legally required
To send me a copy
Of their version of the theme

I spend all day listening
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To recordings of versions of the theme from M*A*S*H
I'm building more shelving
So I can store the tapes of the recordings
Of the versions of the theme from…
M*A*S*H

It's my legacy
I will always be
To everybody and to me
The guy who wrote the theme
From M*A*S*H!
Guh-guh-guh. (Mimics heart beating)

And on every spine
Of every tape
On every shelf I see
The actual name
Of the theme from M*A*S*H
Is staring back at me
It's Suicide is Painless
Maybe in retrospect
I should have called the song
The theme from M*A*S*H
(Mimes put a gun into his mouth and stays still for a few seconds)
Hey!
I was just cleaning it!