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The Pirates of Penzance

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The Pirates of Penzance

When Federic Was a Little Lad

When Frederic was a little lad
he proved so brave and daring
His father thought he'd prentice him
to some career seafaring
I was, alas, his nurserymaid,
and so it fell to my lot
To take and bind the promising boy
apprentice to a pi-lot
A life not bad for a hearty lad
though surely not a high lot
Though I'm a nurse, you might do worse,
than make your boy a pi-lot.

I was a stupid nurserymaid,
on breakers always steering
And I did not catch the word a'right,
through being hard of hearing
Mistaking my instructions which
within my brain did gyrate
I took and bound this promising boy
apprentice to a pi-rate
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A sad mistake it was to make,
and doom him to a vile lot
I bound him to a pirate, YOU,
instead of to a pi-lot.

I soon found out beyond all doubt
the scope of this disaster
But I hadn't the face to return to my place
and break it to my master
A nursing maid is not afraid
of what you people call work
So I made up my mind to go as a kind
of piratical maid of all work
And that is how you find me now
a member of this shy lot
Which you wouldn't have found
had he been bound
apprentice to a pi-lot.