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Ruminate



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Ruminate

State of Change

A tension grows inside me
I feel it every day
It's when I can't sleep
Or dont know what to say
And it's this feeling that stops
Me from living my life
I know I'll never break it
I've lost the urge to even try

But this darkness I feel is not sadness, it's apathy.
Growing up has taught me not to fear feeling sad, but to fear feeling nothing at all.
See I can deal with the ups and downs in life because they balance each other out, but it's the flat lines that will kill me.
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This place isn't what makes me happy, it's the change that brings me hope. Now I live in a constant state of change trying desperately to hold on to any hope I have left. But I'm running out of places to go.

And I'm scared to death of what happens
When I have no options left
I'll just have to keep running
Until I am out of breath
I'll just have to keep running
Until I am out of breath
I'll just have to keep running
Until I am out of breath