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Mindgames



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Mindgames

Dreaming the Circus

When I step alone into my favorite, funny, shiny place,
I feel the crowd starts looking at me.
They came this way to laugh and see.
For all my life I must have been compared to a joker, a loony,
The mad cap in town.

So when you all stop fooling me and look into my heart,
You'll understand, I am more than just a face.
Yes you've also seen me cry, well what's it up to you.
You're only watching, I'll be the clown.

I'm walking through the suburbs just to find no one there,
No one to comfort me.
I turn around and notice, a wife's taking care
for children who wait and see.
Go and express your emotions, a voice cries out loud,
no one who wants to hear.

He enters the room but nobody noticed.
Acts like a fool while the eyes looked strangely annoyed at him.
I'm the invincible winner, afraid to show you some of my weaknesses.
Did you see me winning the game inside my head?

He slowly pulls through, fighting to be recognized, in social life.

He hopes to leave them satisfied,
when they apparently repeat the rumours that they've heard somewhere.
Is it the clothes I wear, the way I look, the age I had a date at last,
the cover of my face, the people in this place.
I doubt I'll ever find a trace.
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He's standing there alone, struggling for acknowledgement,
in his own way.

He's staring at the walls, counting every brick away.
There's no escape.

I'm the greatest live pretender! I ignore the things I feel!
Never mind the way I'm acting! It's a play, it's not for real!

When I'm back inside my head, I see the show comes to an end.
There's nothing more that I can see.
It's only just the inner me.
I think I am back to where I started.
The wheel's turning round, round and round.

A summary of what's in me will lead me to eternity.
I've been the world's most crazy man.
I'll show you all the things I can.
Hero, victim, fighter, loser, bastard, kind man.
They're all a part of you.

I'm watching the dance of the circles. They're moving around.
They end where it all began.
Projecting them into my memory.
I soon will find out, the man I'm supposed to be.
Why didn't you show all your anger, your fear and your tears!
He stepped back and ran away.