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Daniel Ingram



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Daniel Ingram

May the Best Pet Win

Now, Rainbow, my dear, I cannot express my delight
It's abundantly clear
That somewhere out here
Is the pet that will suit you just right
I can't wait to get started, but first let me set a few rules
It's of utmost importance
The pet that I get
Is something that's awesome and cool
Awesome and cool, got it!
I have so many wonderful choices, just wait, you will see
I need something real fast like a bullet to keep up with me
Sure! How 'bout a bunny?
They're cutesy and wootsie and quick as can be
Cutesy, wootsie? Have you even met me?
Rainbow, have faith
You see, I will bet you
Somewhere in here is the pet that will get you
Fluttershy: Come on, the sky's the limit!
Rainbow Dash: Sky is good. I'd like it to fly.
Fluttershy: Really? Because I think this widdle puddy tat has your name written all over it. Yes, he does. Aww, look, he likes you!
Rainbow Dash: Pass.
I have so many wonderful choices for you to decide
There are otters and seals
With massive appeal
Rainbow Dash: Otters and seals do not fly.
Fluttershy: Maybe not, but I've seen this particular seal catch ten feet of air when he breaches the water!
Rainbow Dash: That's it. I'm outta here.
Wait! There must be a pet here
That will fit the ticket
How 'bout a ladybug, or a cute cricket?
Rainbow Dash: Bigger. And cooler.
Fluttershy: Bigger, cooler. Right.
I've got just the thing in that tree, Dash
Meet your new fabulous pet, Squirrely
Rainbow Dash: It's just a squirrel.
Fluttershy: Not just any squirrel. A flying squirrel!
Rainbow Dash: ...Yeah. So, like I was saying...
Fluttershy, pal, this won't cut it
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I need a pet to keep up with me
Something awesome, something flying
With coolness that defies gravity!
Fluttershy: I'm sensing you want an animal that can fly.
Rainbow Dash: Ya think?
I have plenty of wonderful creatures who soar in the sky
Like a sweet hummingbird or a giant monarch butterfly
Rainbow Dash: Better, but cooler.
I see. How 'bout an owl, or a wasp, or a toucan?
There's so many wonderful creatures the likes of that
There are falcons and eagles
They are both quite regal
Or perhaps what you need is a dark and mysterious bat?
Rainbow Dash: Now you're talking. But instead of just one standout, now that's too many.
So many choices, and such riches aplenty
Fluttershy: Not a bad problem to have, if you ask me.
The bat would be awesome, but the wasp I'm digging too
Do you have something in a yellow striped bat?
Fluttershy: No.
I've got a hot pink flamingo, just dying to meet you
What to do, what to do? A prize! That's it! There's really just one way
To find out which animal's best
Hold a contest of speed, agility, and guts
That will put each pet to the test
Don't forget style, that should be considered
Then we'll know for sure who's best of the litter
The one who is awesome as cool
Just like me
Can't settle for less, 'cause I'm the best
So a contest we will see
Who's the number one, greatest, perfectest pet
In the world for me!
May the games
Begin
And may the best pet win!