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Del Tha Funkee Homosapien
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If You Must (lp version)
作詞：Teren Delvon Jones
It's important to practice good hygiene
At least if you want to run with my team
I'm 'bout to get into some shit that I've seen
This fool's breath formants so bad it'll melt your ice cream
They say don't say nothing if you can't say nice things
Sittin' too close and hear my boy like my eye sting
I tired to be subtle, hand him a stick of gum
I was a victim of breath on the
Running his yap about what sets he from
Gotta get some gum, gotta gets him some
He turned it down, his teeth was brown
Excruciating, boring, it was a new sensation
I had to ask the dope to pass the soap
'Cuz his toe had the stench of crustaceans
Or bathrooms in the bus station
He had a can of oh he had some raisins
Amazin'
Head to toe BO, he didn't know
Used to the fragrance
Just as the days went without bathin'
He felt manly and not like a maiden
He had one dread and fungus
Said he worked on people's toilets with plungers
Girls thought the guy we were with the tongue, yo
So guys take your queue from this little number
You gotta wash your ass, if you must
You gotta wash your hair, if you must
You gotta brush your teeth, if you must
Or else you'll be funk-ay
You gotta wash your ass, if you must
You gotta wash your hair, if you must
You gotta brush your teeth, if you must
Or else you'll be funk-ay
You can never go down, and never go down
And never go down the drain
You can never go down, and never go down
And never go down the drain
You can never go down, and never go down
And never go down the drain
You can never go down, and never go down
And never go down the drain
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Now in class you need total concentration
But there's kids in the back holding conversations
Crackin' on each other and neither were poster boys
Both of 'em smelled like the type that soap avoid
Coast enjoyed a leave of absence
One fool's feet smelled like it struck some matchsticks
Brimstone, girls would never bring him home
I was laughin' and his friend raised his tone and said
'Bud, you rolled all over yourself', yeah
I know some people and your ass would be submerged
Like you need to do in water 'cuz you smell like a turd
Want a cap, get some courage your feet smell horrid
But look it up and while you at it get a cup
And squeeze the sweat out your sweatshirt and drink it or gargle
You get our vote for most stinkiest
That nigger started thinking the shit
Said I was frail, I said he was stale
Under arms is right, undergarments might
'Bout the leap out your holy sweats
Then we hold him messin' after this I'm gonna collect
Nigger check yourself, respect yourself
And watch your motherfuckin' body 'fore your sweatshirt melt
And ready your act of no lady find you attractive
The funk got you captive
You don't need a map, bitch
You gotta wash your ass, if you must
You gotta wash your hair, if you must
You gotta brush your teeth, if you must
Or else you'll be funk-ay
You gotta wash your ass, if you must
You gotta wash your hair, if you must
You gotta brush your teeth, if you must
Or else you'll be funk-ay
You can never go down, and never go down
And never go down the drain
You can never go down, and never go down
And never go down the drain
You can never go down, and never go down
And never go down the drain
You can never go down, and never go down
And never go down the drain
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