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Seanan McGuire
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Red Roses and Dead Things
I'm not the kind of girl who's difficult to figure out.
I'm not the kind of girl who likes to make her suitors doubt.
I've always been a Marilyn -- that's Munster, not Monroe --
And I like a man who knows the things that men weren't meant to know, so,
Bring me red roses and make me swoon;
Take me for a boat ride in the Black Lagoon.
A picnic in the graveyard is my heart's delight,
And I love to go out walking on the Devil's Night.
Kiss me at midnight where the wolfsbane blooms,
Promise me your heart in ancient airless rooms.
It isn't all that hard to make a love connection,
I only need a little sweetness and a resurrection.
I don't want pearls, I don't need diamond rings,
All I really want from you is red, red roses, and dead things.
I find relationships so often are an awful bore.
So many gentlemen just don't know what a chainsaw's for.
Black is the new pink, they say, and fashion's never wrong --
I think I've finally found a fashion where I can belong, so...
Bring me red roses and make me sigh;
Promise me that dreaming even death may die.
Won't you poison my coffee with a loving hand,
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And then bring me back to life to follow your command?
Hold me as tightly as padlocked chain,
Tell me that you only love me for my brain.
It isn't all that hard to prove what your love means,
I only need a little kindness and a guillotine.
I don't want pearls, I don't need diamond rings,
All I'll ever ask from you is red, red roses, and dead things.
I'm not the kind of girl who plays it cool or plays it coy;
I figure life's too short, and we have too much to enjoy.
Take me to your secret lair and put me on your slab;
Don't need to take me to the opera, baby, take me to your lab, so...
Bring me red roses and make me yours;
Sail with me to eldritch and uncharted shores.
It isn't all that hard to make me yours forever --
I only need to hear your plan before you pull the lever.
I don't want pearls, I don't need diamond rings,
All I really want from you is red, red roses;
All I'll ever ask from you is red, red roses;
All I really need from you is red, red roses, and dead things.
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