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Trevor Moore
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God Hates The Tips
God hates the tips of little baby's dicks.
God hates the tips of little baby's dicks.
So if your kid's a male,
Even though he'll scream and yell,
You gotta cut it off or their little soul will burn in hell.
Well way back in the beginning,
God was making men and women,
And the fish of the sea and the birds of song.
He announced he made perfection,
But on closer inspection he noticed that he left one piece a bit too long.
God hates the tips of little baby's dicks.
God hates the tips of little baby's dicks.
So if your kid's a male,
Even though he'll scream and yell,
You gotta cut it off or their little soul will burn in hell.
God gathered people's leaders,
Said start snipping baby's wieners.
This will be a sign of our love and covenant.
A few then went and raised objections,
Saying they didn't see the connection,
But he said 'I'm God so none of this needs to make sense.'
He told us 'go cut 'em with the scalpel!
Go cut 'em with the scissors!
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Or go and perform a metzitzah!'
And that's where the Rabbi sucks the blood
Out the baby's penis with his mouth.
I swear to God that's a real thing go and Google it.
Now today across the land,
People still keep his commands,
And children learn their first lesson right after birth.
The ones who are supposed to protect them
Hold them down and painfully correct them
Then they smile and say 'welcome to life on earth.'
God hates the tips of little baby's dicks.
God hates the tips of little baby's dicks.
So if your kid's a male,
Even though he'll scream and yell,
You gotta cut it off or their little soul will burn in hell.
God hates the tips of little baby's dicks.
God hates the tips of little baby's dicks.
Take a little off the top,
Because that's what God instructs,
Unless it's not then ancient pervs just made it up.
Unless it's not then ancient pervs just made it up.
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