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Flobots
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If I
If I hadn't been a quiet introspective kid
If I hadn't been a nerd, wouldn't have met with him
If we hadn't observed we'd be the best of friends
That preferred the spoken word to the toke and binge
If momma hadn't died when I was young
Would me and sis been so tight from jump?
If dad hadn't lost his mind to a disease
Would I be up here askin' ya'll to notice me?
In the dark times, didn't know where the path went
I was close to the edge like Grand Master Flash said
It was hands of my friends that held me back
Yes, without them I'd MJ keep slidin' backwards
Or be a hypocrite like some others have been
If that and the other hadn't happened
Don't know that I'd ever been Brer Rabbit
Askin' how many if's between hero and has-been?
If I, if I, if I had only known
That I would be a lamb to the slaughter
Now I know
If I, if I, if I had only known
I know, I bet it only makes me stronger
Now I know, now I know
Now I know, know, know
Now I know, now I know
Now I know, know, know
If I hadn't grown up in the 80's
Experiencing the various things that made me
Would I still be standing center stage
Trying to innovate new ways to demonstrate?
If mommy-daddy hadn't turned off Mork and Mindy
To inform us divorce was pending
Would him and me have spent these 23 years in a frenzy
Moving back and forth with such forceful energy?
I remember when I was a little baby
Lying there alone on my pillow casing
Upset already I could feel the aging
The urge to return was debilitating
And maybe I'm still afraid and need to
Cry a little harder for the world of play things
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Stop looking back on these silly day dreams
Sing along with me if you feel the same way
If I, if I, if I had only known
That I would be a lamb to the slaughter
Now I know
If I, if I, if I had only known
I know, I bet it only makes me stronger
Now I know, now I know
Now I know, know, know
Now I know, now I know
Now I know, know, know
If I had known what awaited was unplanned
If I had known the blade was in a loved one's hand
If I had known of the possible injury
If I had known the altar was meant for me
But now I know nobody can predict events
And now I know there's cracks in the picket fence
Now I know that something else exists
And now I know a life can be built from this
If I had known emotions would still remain
If I had known that time wouldn't heal the pain
If I had known the intent of the injury
If I had known the altar wasn't meant for me
Now I know there's treasure hidden in these scars
Now I know there's presence in an empty yard
Now I know what it took for me to survive
But now I know where to go to become alive
If I, if I, if I had only known
That I would be a lamb to the slaughter
Now I know
If I, if I, if I had only known
I know, I bet it only makes me stronger
Now I know, now I know
Now I know, know, know
Now I know, now I know
Now I know, know, know
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