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Ben Folds
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Bitch Went Nuts
I took her with me to the Christmas office party
mistake
She did a line, and started spouting all of her Liberal Garbage
Bro, I'm so ashamed
I never heard such shit in all my life
I hoped one day to mold you into the perfect wife
But you blew my hopes sky high
The bitch went nuts
started talking bout politics
in front of all my bosses
bullshit from the internet
the bitch went nuts
I'll never be a partner at this rate
Not with Jane fucking Fonda Jr. as my date
oh no
oh no, no
it took me and a couple of men to restrain her
you shoulda seen her
she freaked out and keyed John Franklin Jr.'s brand new
Beamer
she called us bigots with her fist in the air
and as she did they could see all her armpit hair
now they think that I'm a fucking asshole
the bitch went nuts
started talkin bout vegetables
to the wives of my co-workers
yeah, cruelty to animals
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she thinks because
she reads books she must be smarter
but now when I close my eyes
I'll be fucking Jimmy Carter
oh no
oh no, no
oh no, no
couldn't you have just nodded and smiled
from 9 to 12 PM
instead of telling all of your conspiracy theories
to all my bosses
and all my friends
the bitch went nuts (nuts)
started puttin down the Christians
and all about what the White-man did to the Indians
How could I know? (How could I know?)
that she never done blow before
she sounded 'fuck Dick Cheney!'
then she puked on Franklin's floor
oh no
oh no
oh no, no
oh no, no
oh no
alright
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