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The Vandals



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The Vandals

Grandpa's Last Xmas

Mom Says, 'Put on your Christmas best.'
Grandpa's coming down this year and it might be his last.
Why Mom? You say that every time.
It seem that he's been dying ever since I was nine.

I don't mean no disrespect because he's old and mean.
But how come we invite him when he always makes a scene?

Tell me
Why does, he hit me with his cane?
And why should I get him a gift if he doesn't know my name?
How come, he always calls me 'Kate'
And forgets his dentures on his dinner plate?

This could be Grandpa's last Christmas
That's what Mother said.
This could be Grandpa's last Christmas
And soon he might be dead, so be nice.

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What can I say to someone 300 years old?
When he seems so content staring at the jello mold.
Please Mom, let me go out and play
Or soon I will go deaf like him from hearing him complain.

I know, his life's been long and hard
But he deserves some quiet and peace in a nice graveyard
Grandpa, I love you just the same
But I know that you won't be happy until you drive us all insane

This could be Grandpa's last Christmas
That's what Mother said.
This could be Grandpa's last Christmas
And soon he might be dead, so be nice.
Be nice...to Grandpa...cuz he's old....and he smells,
And he's gonna die soon...be nice to Grandpa