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Weird Al Yankovic
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Constipated (AAvril Lavigne 'Complicated' parody)
Save a peice for me.
Pizza party at your house.
I went, just to check it out.
19 extra larges.
What a shame,
No one came.
Just us, eating all alone.
You said 'Take the pizza home'
No sense letting all this go to waste.
So then I faced
Pizza all day,
And everyday
There's cheese round the clock,
It's getting me blocked.
And I sure don't care for irregularity.
Tell me,
Why'd you have to go and get me so constipated?
'Cause right now I'd do anything to just get my bowels evacuated.
In the bathroom.
I sit and I wait and I strain and I sweat and I clench and I feel the pain.
Oh, Should I take laxatives of get my colon irrigated?
No, no, no.
I was feeling pretty down
'Till my girlfriend came around.
We're just so alike in every way,
I gotta say.
In fact, I just thought I might
Pop the question there that night.
I was kissing her so tenderly,
But woe is me,
Who would've guessed
Her family crest
I'd suddenly spy
tatooed on her thigh.
And son of a gun,
It's just like the one on me!
Tell me,
How was I supposed to know we were both related?
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Belive me, If I knew she was my cousin we never would have dated.
What to do now?
Should I go ahead and propose,
And get hitched,
And have kids with 11 toes,
And move to Alabama where that kind of thing is tolerated?
No, no, no... Oooh
I had so much on my mind
I thought maybe I'd unwind and
Try out that new roller-coaster ride
And the guide
Said not to stand,
But that's a demand that I couldn't meet.
I got on my feet,
And stood up instead,
And knocked off my head, you see.
Tell me,
Why'd I have to go and get myself decapitated?
This really is a major inconvinience.
Oh man, I really hate it!
It's such a drag, now,
I can't eat,
I can't breathe,
I can't snore,
I can belch or yodell any more.
I can't spin round on my nose,
Or even read sports illustrated.
Oh no.
Why i have to go and get myself all mutelated?
I gotta tell ya,
Life without a head kinda makes me irritated.
What a bummer!
I can't blink,
I can't cough,
I can't sneeze,
but my neck is enjoying a pleasant breeze now.
I havn't been the same sing my head and I were seperated.
No, no, no.
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